Ryan Thomas Goodenough

Thanks Moodle!

While walking down the street one day a US senator is tragically hit by a truck and dies.
His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.

‘Welcome to heaven,’ says St. Peter. ‘Before you settle in, it Seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we’re not sure what to do with you.’

‘No problem, just let me in,’ says the senator.

‘Well, I’d like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we’ll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity.’

‘Really, I’ve made up my mind. I want to be in heaven,’ says the senator.
‘I’m sorry, but we have our rules.’

And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf Course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him.

Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the Expense of the people.

They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and champagne.

Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time that before he Realizes it, it is time to go.

Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises …

The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him.

‘Now it’s time to visit heaven.’

So, 24 hours pass with the senator joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, Before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns.

‘Well, then, you’ve spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity.’

The senator reflects for a minute, then answers: ‘Well, I would never have said it before, I Mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell.’

So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell.

Now the doors of the elevator open and he’s in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage.

He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls from above…

The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder. ‘I don’t understand,’ stammers the senator. ‘Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there’s just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?’

The devil looks at him, smiles and says…….

‘Yesterday we were campaigning. Today you voted.’

Finally!

It’s a good companion to the other record I’m particularly proud of: my score for the ultimate balance test.

Wii Fit Age: 25

BMI: 24.83

Weight: 199.7

I’m down 4 pounds since Day 16, but keep in mind there are some variables, including:

• What did I eat?
• When did I exercise and weigh in?
• How much other exercise did I get that day?

One thing that I have found to be particularly difficult is controlling the urge to snack, snack, snack on the weekends. But whatever I’m doing seems to be working so far.

Rock! I swear, real rock.

A pleasant surprise.

Am I the only person who watched that Vh1 show, Band on the Run? What a great show. Vh1 challenged 4 bands to earn more in ticket and merchandising sales than anyone else and the winner got a record deal.

The reason why I ask is that this Glasvegas single really reminds me of the winner from that TV show, Flickerstick.

Geraldine is like a lot of songs from Flickerstick’s last album–a lot of stuff with a good appeal and relatively good hooks, but nothing mind blowing. I like Geraldine, it’s just not something that’s terribly unique.

Grade: B

How did that become a bad thing? I’m willing to give up quite a bit of my earnings to help people who need it. Granted, it’s hard to define “need,” but I’ll leave that to the government.

I heard someone the other day say that they “feel bad for Sarah Palin.” Don’t.

Besides the fact that this sort of emotion can swing closely contested elections, there really is no reason to feel bad for her.

Look, it’s not like she was just sitting around her office before John McCain landed in his helicopter and took her away to be VP. In fact, she and her people actively lobbied for her to be the vice president. This was a political process, full of lobbying and late night phone calls, like any other.

Another thing: would it be wrong if a teacher gave you a bad grade because you came to a test completely unprepared and answered most of the questions wrong? Of course not–that’s the basis of our grading system. Palin’s inability to name a newspaper she reads, her inability to recall the functions and responsibilities of the office she may command, and her inability to recall any other Supreme Court decision besides Roe v. Wade is symptomatic of a much bigger problem: she is incapable of doing a good job.

She should have known all of those things and then some. This is the biggest test of her life. She should be studying every minute if she really has these enormous gaps in her knowledge. If this election was being run by a teacher, I imagine that Palin would have already received an “F.”

After last week’s awfulness, pop rock is a welcome change.

Go Go Go by The 88 has a lot of initial appeal. Good drums, likeable lead singer voice, catchy refrain.  I would have preferred a slightly tighter production–I think the vocals are a tad muffled and the instruments aren’t as sharp as they should be. Go Go Go is supposed to be a punchy song (and it is), but it really needs to be a bit tighter at parts.

Beyond production problems, Go Go Go is the appropriate length (3 minutes) and has enough of a hook to make me come back for more. It’s also another one of those singles that makes me wonder what the rest of the album is like. Well done.

Grade: B+

I’ve been having a blast with the new iPhone app, Pano, a panorama application for your iPhone’s built-in camera.  Take 4 photos (with cues) and Pano will automatically merge them.  Check out my initial projects (that last one was a hoot to create):

Wii Fit Age: 29

BMI: 25.33

Weight: 203.7

See?! Weight’s up 2 pounds 9 days after my last check-in. Granted, the weekend’s activities (mainly the eating portions) didn’t help much, but I’m back to needing to lose 10 pounds to reach my goal.

Last Friday, I had my BMI down to 24.97 (just within the “normal” weight category), but jumped back up very quickly.  I think half the challenge for me is controlling what I eat. I have a hard time saying “no” to things I always enjoy. But I think I need to start saying “no.” Just because you enjoy something doesn’t mean you should have it all the time.

FYI, my current Wii Fit routine is the 10-minute rhythm boxing, 10-minute hula hoop (if I make it through), 6-minute Advanced Step, and then another 10 minutes or so of yoga/strength training. I think the strength training is where I can lose most weight and, as the winter months set in, I may start doing strength training solely with a few balance games thrown in for good measure.

Oh come on! Country?!

At least it’s “real country”–not too much pop here.  But “that no good white trash ho” as part of the refrain? I think we can do better. It’s not really outrageous, but it is pretty ridiculous. This song is crap (if the song isn’t going to make an effort to employ a better vocabulary, neither will I).

Grade: F